Southern Baptists Spamming Google: A Search Query WTF

While not especially shocking nor deliberately weird, this is perhaps the most perplexing thing I have ever discovered through a search query. For novel research I googled “asthma drugs coma.” I at first thought the page I clicked on was for one of those stupid spam search pages that exist to put ads in your face because it was just a long list of search queries for abortificants. Even a list of fetus flushers is weird, but that’s only the beginning. There were no ads, and the queries weren’t hyperlinks, just ceaseless words in a list. Gems like:

  • medications to help induce miscarriage
  • powerpoint presentation of acute cholelithisis operation induced acute renal failure and ards
  • french bulldog induce vomiting
  • can salt baths induce my period
  • creatine induced cholestitis
  • anxiety induced asthma
  • wake induced lucid dream tips
  • libs laser induced breakdown spectroscopy fundamentals application ppt
  • particle induced x ray emmision system fendi ppt

But that’s not the weird part. The weird part is that the website is run by “Waco Baptist Church.”

Yes, you read that right.

About halfway down this very long list, is a different font that says:

Welcome to the Waco Baptist Church web page.  We hope that you find something here that blesses you today.

My best guess is that they are using their site exactly as the search spammers do, as a lure. But instead of flashing ads in your face they are hoping to snag wayward women in order to save their souls, or burn them as witches. This theory is supported in that, sandwiched between “how to self induce a miscarriage using medicine at home” and “alchohol induced dimentia anger” it offers their email address and:

We want this web site to serve the needs of those viewing it.  In order to better do that we need to hear from you.  Thanks.

Can you just imagine a bunch of Southern Baptist church ladies sitting around in their fancy hats, practical heels and serious faces, brainstorming this list of search queries that potential baby-stranglers would search for? Or more likely it’s some graying pastor with a determined face, running his own google searches into the wee hours of the morning, learning about the ways of wicked women who have induced miscarraige using the dangerously effective abortificant, acupuncture. You know, for research.

But even if the list sought to induce gals who’ve induced miscarraige into the church, who the fuck would find such a list useful? They’re not even hyperlinks! If anyone can shed some light on this weirdness, I’d appreciate it.

One thought on “Southern Baptists Spamming Google: A Search Query WTF”

  1. this planet is filled with freakazoids some are easier to spot than others. I stay away from organized everything mostly to protect myself

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