Category Archives: Books, Writing, Publishing

Hating Sansa Stark (and Not for Her Femininity)

Sansa Stark fan art by EnjoyTheBlood with the overlaid text "In the [stet] real life, the monsters win"
Sansa Stark by EnjoyTheBlood
SPOILERS WARNING: This post assumes you’ve seen the first season of Game of Thrones or read the first book in A Song of Ice and Fire. There are spoilers for the latest episode, S05E03, “High Sparrow” but they are clearly marked in the post.

I Can Be a Feminist…and Still Dislike Sansa Stark

My beloved Bitch magazine is the latest in a series of articles claiming that the widespread dislike of Game of Thrones’ Sansa Stark is due to misogyny. The argument goes like this:

 Make no mistake, Sansa Stark is one tough cookie. Sansa isn’t, however, a typical “strong female character” like her sister Arya. Her strength and power lie in her mind and in her ability to assess, adapt to, and manipulate situations by means other than brute force—something that’s rare on Game of Thrones. In show’s assortment of extremely powerful women, Sansa may fade to the background. But that’s actually part of her goal as a character, because she thrives by sticking to the shadows rather than attracting attention to herself.

The actress playing Stark claims Stark has figured out how to “weaponize femininity, how to turn what looks to casual viewers like a disadvantage into an asset.” Another article asserts:

It annoys me that people only like the feminine characters when they act like male characters. And they always go on about feminism. Like, you’re rooting for the people who look like boys, who act like boys, who fight like boys. Root for the girls who wear dresses and are intellectually very strong.

I too want traditionally feminine characters who manipulate their situation without brute force. But the problem is that Sansa Stark is not meant to be a powerful, feminine woman. She is written to be weak. On purpose. She is forthright when she should be withholding, emotional when she should be strategic. Always reacting rather than planning, always the victim, being batted from one danger to the next.

Sansa Stark by Sari Sariola
Sansa Stark by Sari Sariola

In fact, the entire clusterfuck of terrible events that happens in season one could all have been prevented if Sansa Stark hadn’t been so foolish to trust the queen mother with things she shouldn’t have said (I’m being vague here for the sake of spoilers). This intel gives the queen the chance to betray Sansa’s father, an event which sets in motion all the terrible things that befall Sansa and her family. Moreover, it’s not as though Sansa took a calculated risk that went awry. She naively thought the queen was her friend. Naivety, not inner strength, seems to be her primary character trait.

I feel like these feminists want to believe that George R.R. Martin has set Stark up as a “strong woman of intelligence” because they want to give him the benefit of the doubt, that he intended to have such a character. They want to believe that Martin means well. But they aren’t giving him enough credit. If Martin wanted to write a character who is “quietly wearing pretty dresses and pushing teacakes around on her plate as she maintains a façade, refusing to break character and betray herself” (as the Bitch article so nicely puts it) he would, and there would be no bickering about who she is and what she stands for. It would be clear. I know that, because he already wrote a character to fill that role, and it isn’t Sansa Stark.

(And no, it isn’t the mother of dragons either, though I think one could make a convincing argument that Daenerys Targaryen’s strength comes not from her army but from her strategy.)

The Strong, Clever, Feminine Heroine of Game of Thrones

Margaery and Sansa by MiliaTimmain
Margaery and Sansa by MiliaTimmain

If you want proof, then you need look no further than Margaery Tyrell. Margaery is easily a foil for Sansa, in that both of them have been engaged to the king, and both are living in the same lion’s den. But they handle this situation very differently.

Let’s compare. Sansa Stark had a schoolgirl crush on on the prince, Margaery recognized right away that he was a dangerous psychopath. Sansa Stark’s reaction to figuring this out was to plot her escape (an act that she was too timid to plan herself) while Margaery played on the prince’s sadism to get closer to his shiny, coveted crown. Sansa wants to be a Disney princess; she thinks nothing of politics beyond her own survival. Margaery went out among the people and heard their grievances, and was so bold as to challenge the queen about representing their interests. Sansa fails to recognize her natural ally in the imp, and is way too trusting of Little Finger. If their roles were reversed, there is little doubt that Margaery would have found countless way to exploit a marriage to Tyrion Lannister.

Margaery as a queen playing card
Margaery as a queen playing card
Sansa Stark illustrated as a playing card by Simona Bonafini
credit: Simona Bonafini

 

 

 

 

 

Sure, Sansa lies about her allegiance  to stay alive, but this doesn’t make her clever. It’s always tentative and tinged with fear. In contrast, Margaery lies to get what she wants. There are grey areas here: it’s partly due to Sansa’s disclosure that Margaery knew of prince Joffrey’s depravity. But the actions of Margaery show clearly how Sansa is meant to be perceived. Margaery is intended to be the feminine beguiler these other feminists long for while Sansa is intended to be read as weak and naive. Martin demonstrates this not only in their actions, but in the consequences to their actions.

For example, in the latest episode Sansa is again forced to lie **SPOILERS S05E03** when she is offered as a marriage candidate to the psychopaths who brutally murdered her people. Sophie Turner plays this perfectly, showing Sansa’s lies to be believable, while all the time you know she’s doing all she can not to scream bloody murder. Meanwhile, Margaery lies in this episode too. She speaks to the young king about his mother with words of flattery, her intended message buried so far down that when the king questions his mother, he doesn’t even recognize it as her idea. Then when the queen confronts Margaery, her false worship of the queen is laid on so thick the queen is left with no rational way to suggest Margaery may be at fault. Margaery is a gifted deceiver, she does it naturally and well and in the end it gets her what she wants, all the way to the crown. **END SPOILERS**

When Margaery’s ploys succeed, the author is showing us how clever and sly she is. All of her scheming is disguised as someone else’s idea. She plays the innocent, but is constantly advancing her position. She is smart enough to recognize that the queen is her biggest adversary, and daring enough to to look for opportunities to push the queen aside.

In contrast, Sansa Stark is where she is because she has little sense of who she can and should trust. The current scheme she is thrust into was not her idea at all, but Little Finger’s. Imagine if Margaery had the chance Sansa has, SAME SPOILERS AGAIN to regain her castle and avenge her people? I have no doubt not only would she be eager to wed the psychotic Ramsey Bolton but, critically, it would have been her idea. But because this is Sansa, and Ramsey Bolton is just about the worst character in a world of deplorable characters, we get the sense that the Little Bird is again being led into a terrible trap.  END SPOILERS Sansa is still too naive to have schemes of her own.

Hating Sansa Stark, Just Like I’m Supposed To

detailed fan art of Sansa Stark by Bubug
Bubug has more beautiful illustrations of Sansa and the Hound

While  I don’t like Sansa Stark, I’m not with the unsophisticated reader who would have her shunted from the books, dying suddenly so we can get back to the other characters. I don’t see Sansa’s weakness as a failing of the author. Sure, in a world where most of the other characters are marked by their brilliance, honor, or strength, it’s easy to hate Sansa Stark, who is none of these things.

But we must remember that Sansa is barely more than a girl, and a royal at that, who has lived a sheltered life. Martin needs at least one character like that in the series to show us: this is what happens to naive girls (or boys) in a brutal world. If he killed her off, we’d not get to see how the slings and arrows of fate will turn Sansa into more than a survivor, but a leader.

Much of the world of Game of Thrones centers on this process. We watch young Arya turn from a little girl into a trained killer. We watch Daenerys Targaeryan learn to rule nations. These are plots that have developed not over chapters but over thousands of pages.

Those who would argue that Sansa is strong overlook that her weakness is a deliberate decision the author has made to show us that she is not ready to lead. That’s good writing. That’s character development. In the end, she won’t be another Margaery. Margaery has always been conniving. Her family raised her to be shrewd and careful. Every scene shows that is who she is; that is where she comes form. It makes her wicked, but likeable.

But Sansa is a Stark. She was raised to be honorable. Truth and justice were the values of her parents. She was taught that survival means looking out for your people (after all, winter is coming!) and there will be suffering in any case (did you hear about winter?). She was not taught to be shrewd, and this has led to the ample poor decisions that make her unlikeable. The choices she has made to stay alive go against all that the Starks hold dear.  How will she become a worthy daughter to the unimpeachable values of her parents, while navigating a world where such honor will get you killed?

In the game of thrones, “you win or you die” so Sansa must sharpen up, or meet her father’s fate. Watching her story is like watching a pawn advance across a chess board. Martin has written her as a pawn, and rightly so, as her weakness makes the brutality of the knights and queens clashing around her more fearsome to behold. That little pawn keeps moving forward, and it is excruciating to watch unfold. But everyone knows what happens to a pawn that makes it across the board. That is what Sansa’s character is about: not who she is, but the powerful lady Stark she will become.

What India, Burning Man and TC Boyle Have in Common

You may have noticed it’s been a few months since my last post. Likely you didn’t, but I still feel I owe you an explanation. What follows are not excuses, merely facts. I never promised to post often, my only commitment is to making what I do share original and worth reading. But in case you are curious, here’s what’s been going on.

In August, I went to Burning Man

Only one post on the blog, but I did create a huge album and playlist as a gift to my burner friends. If you look closely, the link to it is hidden on this site. So I was writing a ton, but not so much blogging. It’s cliche to say so, but Burning Man was nothing short of awesome—in the traditional sense of the word: fearsome and awe-inspiring. Here’s a few photos from my trip.

In October I Went to India

I have three locations on my bucket list: India, Burning Man, and Barcelona. In 2014 I ticked two of these off the list and this summer I go to Spain. Don’t worry, this isn’t a made-for-TV-movie about a terminal patient looking to seize the day. The opportunities just presented themselves all at the same time, and I was in the lucky position in life to take them. Still, I know with this kind of luck I have to be on the lookout for falling anvils and black cats.

I did actually write a long post about India, but I’m still sitting on it. It’s controversial and I want to be sure I have my thoughts in order.

Here’s a tiny selection of the photos I took in India (really tiny, all of these are just from one day). If a web log is a journal, I know I should have written a post for each day of my journey. But I already put a lot of time into sharing all those photos with my Facebook friends, and really, do strangers on the Internet want to see my photos of India? I’m not sure if you do. Here’s that sample anyway.

In January I Got an Awesome Gig

After going home to visit my family (and surviving with zero drama! Amazeballs!) I was offered a writing gig for a kickass site. I’ve been doing copywriting for years here and there, but this was the first time I needed to write several posts a week. And I’m not just writing about lame stuff, but my favorite things ever: books and music.

At the end of the day, I often feel my writing urge satiated by my nifty job. Not only do I enjoy the content, I’m proud of my work there.

To get a taste of what I’ve been up to writing for my new client, here’s a recent interview I did for the site with PEN/Faulkner award-winner TC Boyle.

What’s Next?

As you can see, everything is just grand over here. No complaints and no apologies. But there are some other issues that have made me hesitate to type at’cha. I put a lot of work into setting up separate Tumblr blogs based on the themes I write about, but my love affair with Tumblr has gone sour. The culture of the site has become, at its worst, vindictive and mean. At its best, it is often shallow. But the real gripe I have with Tumblr is that when I share photos with my tablet or phone, they always come out pixelated, and my emails to support on this issue have never received replies.

Meanwhile, the music site I adore, wherein I have more than 42,000 followers, also stopped offering support. Most likely because of conflict with the recording industry, they killed all their uploads and now they only play YouTube videos. It’s not what it once was, and I’ve yet to find a suitable replacement.

You may think, what does Tumblr and some music site have to do with this non-Tumblr,  non Blip.fm blog? Well Tumblr was motivating me to share my adventures in San Francisco. Blip.fm was motivating me to share great music. Both of these things would froth over the short form and, to continue the metaphor into cliche, the cream would rise to the top as blog posts.

Now I’m not sure how to proceed. Should I give up my Tumblr blogs, and just post everything here? If I do, there will be a lot more short content, like single songs and videos without so much explanation. But I’m not sure if I want that. I like that any post you click on here will have plenty of original content, and hopefully some new ideas too.

I’m still pondering these ideas. Maybe I need a rebranding. Maybe I just need a little encouragement. Maybe I will post here less often as people are kind enough to pay me to post elsewhere. But like I said, no apologies. This blog may be sparse lately, but not my life. My life is amazing.

The War of Art – Steven Pressfield

Yesterday You Said Tomorrow room
This anti-resistance headboard via Style Bizarre’s post on procrastination

If you know the name Steven Pressfield, it’s likely because he wrote the book behind the hit movie The Legend of Bagger Vance. I’ve never even seen that movie, much less read the book, but have been eager to read Pressfield’s much-celebrated The War of Art.

The War of Art isn’t a book on how to write.

It is a book on why to write, and a kick in the pants to get you writing now.

The War of Art is not only a book for writers. It is not even only for artists. It is for anyone who has a calling. Whatever it is that you feel in your gut like you were born to do, this book is to help you do that thing. I don’t mean the laundry or the grocery list. I mean that state where you find flow, that thing you do with effortless grace. In its action, you forget who you are, but in its completion you define who you are.

quote from steven pressfield war of art

One of my favorite posts that I’ve ever written is “Overcoming Writers Block: Tickling the Muse II,” wherein, inspired by  Elizabeth Gilbert’s fantastic TED talk, I personify my relationship with the muse. I was surprised to find that The War of Art is pretty much a book-length version of the same thing.

The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles

If you are the protagonist of The War of Art and the muse is your coveted lover, then the villain is Resistance. Resistance is Pressfield’s name for our tendency to fight doing the very thing we love. Resistance will tie your muse to the railroad tracks. It is your job to stop him.

The problem is, once you are good at something, it becomes easy for your ego to get in the way. You’re only as good as your last work, so your ego reminds you it would be better to never work again. That way you can’t risk creating something awful. And before we find flow, before we really get cooking, our deepest terror is that it won’t meet our expectations.

The better our last work is, the bigger our ego is. The bigger our ego is, the harder it is for us to create something new.  From Axel Rose to JD Salinger, this is why celebrated artists  stall. All you Game of Thrones fans are not helping George RR Martin finish the series with all that fan mail. To conquer resistance, he must conquer his own ego.

[ctt tweet=”The War of Art by @SPressfield: Because the biggest thing holding me back is me. http://ctt.ec/G26B9+” coverup=”G26B9″]

The War of Art is an easy read. The topic is one that many writers, and anyone who is obsessed with their own productivity, will be familiar with. He covers the battle against resistance in detail, which results in a short book. Which is fine. Read it slowly. At every moment you feel inspired, stop reading and go do the work (the fitting name of the sequel to The War of Art).

I’ll leave you with another quote. Let it sink in. Then get to work.

You know, Hitler wanted to be an artist. At eighteen he took his inheritance, seven hundred kronen, and moved to Vienna to live and study. He applied to the Academy of Fine Arts and later to the School of Architecture. Ever see one of his paintings? Neither have I. Resistance beat him. Call it overstatement but I’ll say it anyway: it was easier for Hitler to start World War II than it was for him to face a blank square of canvas.

Check Out My Guest Posts on Learn HTML With Song

A cool new site just launched all about producing educational coding music videos. The idea is that if you’re going to get a catchy song stuck in your head, why not have those lyrics teach you HTML, the language of the web?

It’s called Learn HTML With Song, and it’s made by a San Francisco coder, Diane Presler, with more than 20 years experience as an HTML teacher. Here’s an example of one of their videos. Continue reading Check Out My Guest Posts on Learn HTML With Song

Reverse Word Count

Writers have this thing to kick ourselves in the pants where we keep track of our daily word count, and sometimes  publicly share them as a sort of competitive brag.  The writing software I use even has daily word count goals.

These are of little use to me as the novel I’ve been writing for way too long has inched into 180,000 word territory.  If you’re not a word-counter yourself, rest assured, understand that that’s about 80,000 words too many. Continue reading Reverse Word Count

Fan Mail for Evan Peterson: Dark Songs With Pretty Words

Evan J PetersenThis is my friend Evan Peterson. Isn’t he handsome? He runs this nifty press in Seattle, and he writes zombie poetry and other things horrific, queer and clever. He has a timid greyhound rescue dog named after a character in an Oscar Wilde story.

This is a mix tape for Evan. So the songs are a little dark or a little queer, or well-stated, just like Evan and the stuff he writes. I’ve also focused on songs that are new wave, electro, or dark wave as I know those are genres Mr. Petersen and I both favor. In honing the list, I’ve favored songs that embrace big topics like God while fearlessly examining our shadow selves, because I know Evan Petersen thinks about the heavy shit.

And this is the part where I explain the choices. Because what fun is a mix if you don’t overthink it? Continue reading Fan Mail for Evan Peterson: Dark Songs With Pretty Words

Sneak a Listen at 826 Valencia Benefit Album Tracklist

This photo is from the pirate store at 826 Valencia St. in San Francisco. They have drawers full of swarthy things, a small theater that faces an aquarium, and a trap door that I can reveal no more about. They sell practical seafaring goods like sypglasses, powder horns, mermaid bait, etc., in order to fund the after-school writing program that meets there daily. The pirate store and writing center was designed by the same folks who make McSweeney’s, which is to poetry what Apple is computers, so you know it’s done with style. This enormously successful non-profit founded by Dave Eggars has gone on to birth other 826 after-school programs around the country. But each has their own focus: New York has a shop for superheros, the Seattle shop is for space travellers, Chicago’s “Boring Store” is secretly an undercover secret agent supply store. But all of them are a space for professional writers working one-on-one with local kids.

Now that you know how marvelous 826 Valencia is, you can bet that when they put out a benefit album, it’s going to feature a bunch of music that you’ll want to get your hands on.

826 valencia benefit album conver you be my heart

The album is called You Be My Heart and it features The Cloud Room, Melissa Nadler, Bowerbirds, Maps & Atlases and more. Here’s a taste.

The track Mrs. Marquis de Sade from The Cloud Room has an early-nineties jangly vibe.

The Bowerbirds track begins “I’ve seen seven wonders but two were your eyes” and has a lovely keyboard melody.

You’ll be able to buy your own copy of You Be My Heart on December 9th. If you want to know more about 826 Valencia, Dave Eggars’s TED Talk about it is a good start.

 

Against the Figurative Use of the Word Literally

literally Lyra literally sitting
This was drawn by Elder-Misanthrope

Recently Dictionary.com went to the effort to defend figurative use of the word “literally” on their Hot Word blog. Before we get into the details, just a quick reminder so you’re up to speed:

literally
– adj. What actually happened.Synonyms: Actually. Antonyms: figuratively, metaphorically. Usage: I was literally rolling on the floor laughing.

This comic from the Oatmeal explains the controversy nicely.

literally pissed myself the Oatmeal
See the full comic on The Oatmeal

 

So you see, many people are only pretending to “literally piss our selves laughing” while those of us who’ve actually pissed ourselves, sadly, have no way to express our mirth.

Inigo Montoya Princess Bride Gif I do not think it means what you think it means

OK, now that everyone is clear what we’re discussing with what is literally my biggest pet peeve, back to the Hot Word. This thoroughly awful post really calls into question the authority behind Dictionary.com’s blog, and not only because it is wrong. Let’s take it point by point. Continue reading Against the Figurative Use of the Word Literally

Hipster Hating Lives On

I love the latest article in The Awl, I Am An Object Of Internet Ridicule, Ask Me Anything“. It’s about a typewriter busker who ended up getting labeled as a hipster in an Internet meme. For one thing, I dig typewriter buskers.

the photo of the typewriter busker who got hated on for being a hipster
If only people were as upset about NSA surveillance as they were about this picture.

More importantly, as my regular readers may recall, I’ve written two articles about hipster hating, which were republished in a Kansas City entertainment weekly.

It’s this weird quirk of mine that I’m opposed to threats of violence against strangers, simply because of their fashion, beer and bicycle choices, no matter how strange those choices may be. The post in The Awl chronicles what it’s like to be on the receiving end of such threats, and reminds us that people doing weird things (like God-effing-forbid, taking a typewriter out in public) often do them for perfectly understandable reasons. Personally, I take an even more radical position that I don’t think people should be bullied for weirdness, even if there’s absolutely no rationale for their fashion crimes. If only the people posting their hatred of hipsters could devote that passion to fighting climate change or fixing the economy. But no, those are not issues they feel affect them personally, not in the way a guy with clunky glasses, shorts, and a typewriter does. I mean, WHO GAVE THAT GUY THE RIGHT TO SIT IN A PARK WITH A TYPEWRITER?

Before you call the lynch mob though, I ask that you please read the articles I’ve posted on this. Maybe some reason can be talked into you hipster haters before your pitchfork and torches army burns down the whole village.

Hipster Hating

Hipster Subculture Ripe for Parody [Time Magazine]